Something very strange is happening to me.
See, I've always been lazy. I don't know if I'm a procrastinator because I'm lazy, or I'm lazy because I'm a procrastinator……
Chicken before the egg or egg before the chicken, whatever - It's all the same.
The chicken is there and the egg is there.
I am lazy and I am a procrastinator.
But as of recently, this laziness has doubled, tripled, and multiplied at the rate of a pregnant rabbit on steroids…
To the point where I've morphed into a hermit.
I have people leaving me wall posts and messages on Facebook, pissed off at me for "never replying."
I have messages on my phone that I've never replied to, and some that I have, but only after a day or two (or three, or four, or five).
I have friends pleading with me to go out, but I never yield to their demands, because I don't feel like going out.
(Although I did go to Bahrain yesterday with my family. I saw the new Harry Potter movie. It was brilliant. But more on that later when more people have seen it and I won't spoil it for everyone).
See, I've been thinking…… (yes I do think; I don't want any of your snide comments, Summer)
I've been thinking:
It would be scarily easy for me to exclude myself from the outer world. All I'd have to do, really, is turn off my phone, deactivate my Facebook, and stop using MSN. And since we moved recently, only one of my friends knows my house number -and she's in London- and only about four people know where my house is.
I've been dubbed the worst Keep-in-Toucher. And although I tried to deny it first, I now know I'm very worthy of this title.
I just suck at this whole techno-world with a million and one ways to keep in touch… It's supposed to make things easier, but it really doesn't, for me. I talk and talk to loads of people; sometimes they beg me to shut up, and then it gets to a point where I'm having dozens of conversations with dozens of different people. Then it all gets so overwhelming, so I retreat into my silent little shell and relax there.
A really good friend of mine left a post on my wall (after I didn't reply to her for ages) saying:
"Am I that invisible???!"
And that really got to me. Because she isn't. And I hate it when people ignore me or take ages to reply to me. So why am I doing it, damn it?
I guess what I'm trying to say is: I'm really sorry, and it's nothing personal, it really is "me and not you." Except this isn't the clichéd break-up line; it's a make-up line, because I'm going to make it up to everyone who's mad at me at the moment.
Do leave a comment and let me know if you are. I know there's plenty of you and I have the memory span of a goldfish. No, shorter, apparently that goldfish myth has been busted and their memory span can last up to three months......
Ok here's where I'll stop rambling on – Not because I want to, but because our neighbor's security alarm system thing has gone off, and it's really really loud. You'd think someone was robbing the White House itself. It's very headache-brewing.