Showing posts with label third person. Show all posts
Showing posts with label third person. Show all posts

Friday, September 4, 2009

promises and ceiling fans

hey folks.
you know something?
insomnia sucks.
it really does.
so here's something i just wrote.
it's very sappy, and i can't believe i'm posting it.
but i surprise myself everyday.
-


They lay on their backs on the uncomfortable bed, knowing very well they'd rather be there than anywhere else in the world.
He traced an "I love you" on her thigh, and she felt it in her heart before anywhere else.

She inched closer to him, rested her head on his chest. She synchronized her breathing to his.
We are one now, she thought.
I'm yours, he thought.

She listened to the low whir of the turquoise ceiling fan; she listened to his slow breathing; she listened to his steady heartbeat…

Until his heart was the only thing she could hear. It pounded and echoed in her head like thunder, blocking out all the peaceful sounds from just a few seconds before.

She pulled away abruptly and lay down on her back again.

"Are you okay?" He asked, finding her hand and holding it.
"I'm fine," she said.
"You don't seem fine…"
"It's nothing," she laughed apprehensively. "It's just…" And she fell silent.

He watched her for a bit, sensed her embarrassment. He gently placed two fingers under her chin and made her look at him.

"It's me," he whispered. "Tell me."

"It's really nothing. I've always been just a little spooked out by the sound of a heart beating. To me… it sounds like a time bomb ticking away… A reminder of how easily things could go wrong. Like it's counting the seconds we have left on this earth… Until one day, we'll hear it beat for the last time."

He was quiet for a long time, until she was certain she had scared him. She cursed herself and her inability to hold her tongue.

And then, finally, he spoke.

"You may be right… But to me, it's just a reminder of how vulnerable we are. We humans have grown too cocky; we think we are invincible. We do hard drugs, drive fast cars, smoke lots of cigars - and death always hits us like a brick wall; it always shocks us. I think our hearts just serve as a reminder of how fragile we are… But also a reminder of how strong and otherworldly love can make us."

He took her hand and placed her palm on his heart. She stared at him for what could have been an eternity, or maybe just a second.

And then she rested her head on his chest again, and listened to the heart she knew she'd keep safe for the rest of her life.

-
extra cheese for me, please.
also, i realize it's in third person, unlike the other excerpts i've posted, but... i'm having trouble deciding whether i should do it in third person, or first person.
i think first person is the right way to go, since i'm planning on writing from other characters' perspectives, too.
i dunno.
decisions, decisions.
so in my next post i'll tell you how i made the polaroids from my last post.. for those of you who asked.
thanks to all of you who told me they liked them.
i like you too.
take care

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