Typose Syndrome

Typose syndrome is a sudden inflammation of one's fingers, causing one to make very serious typing errors. While mild cases are often successfully treated with the careful treading of one's fingers upon the keyboard, severe cases may require admission to the ICU or even surgery (often requiring more than one intervention) to deal with with complications of the disease process.

Typose syndrome can also occur when one's fingers look and feel perfectly fine, which has caused doctors to believe that typose syndrome might be a psychological disease. It affects both males and females equally.



Causes

1. Hereditary - a parent could carry the gene without being affected.
2. Typose syndrome is heterogeneous, comprising more than one similar condition of differing cause, some not inherited.
3. Greasy fingers.
4. Hyperactiveness.
5. A very important story to tell (not necessarily amusing or interesting).
6. Over-studying.


Researchers have reached the conclusion that typose syndrome usually occurs:
1. in the most embarrassing contexts
2. when one is sleepy
3. when one thinks a story is funny
4. after studying physics.



Symptoms

1. Typos
2. Embarrassment
3. "Giggle" fits
4. Akathisia (the inability to sit still)
5. Festinating speech
6. Drooling
7. Diharrea
8. Inflammation of the cornea




Eponym

The term typose is derived from the Latin word for mistake: erroris.............

Skeptics believe that the term is actually, ironically, derived from a typo that occured during an MSN conversation between a Danya and a Daas - also known as Twinnie.
Daas was attemtping to type the word "typoes" (which is obviously a spelling mistake, but Daas is not the brightest star in the sky).

Diagnosis

Besides the clinical diagnosis, rapidly increasing typos may confirm the diagnosis. In a clinical diagnosis, a CAT scan and an ultrasound are used to locate and trace the origin of the disease, which is usually metastatic at presentation, and more often than not located in the pancreas.

Classic examples of chronic typose syndrome:

1. Dania* was calling Deema, the class genius, who was just refusing to answer her phone. Aggravated, Dania sent a message to Deema, saying:

"Yesterday my friend told me about a fascinating invention called dicking up when someone calls."

She had meant to sound all snippy and cool, but..... (I don't know if you noticed it, dear reader, but it's practically doing the Macarena in a sequined suit...) that typo totally killed everything. And only after a couple of hours did Dania realize what a nasty pun her typo was.

2. Daas (mentioned previously) has a tendency to type "tit" instead of "it" when talking to important peoples.

3. An annoying "friend" was sending Dania* multiple nudges on MSN. After quite a few, Dania had had enough, and so, annoyed, she typed:

"Would you STOP, NUDING ME?"

That's it for today.

Take care, be good, beware of Typose, it is highly contagious.

* Name has been changed to protect the privacy of the patient.